so long, so long...

I know in the past I've avoided "personal" issues in this blog. Although the stuff I've revealed about my unhealthy relationship with star wars is enough fodder for embarrassment.

Things have changed with me recently, I didn't want them to but they did. And there's nothing I can do about it. I'm sorry this sounds really cryptic and vague, I guess behind all of this I'm just not comfortable talking about these kinds of issues on an internet blog. I'm not here to piss and moan. I'm sure lots of eyeballs will roll when this post. I do admit i'm being whiney, self-indulgent and just flat out mopey. I don't mean to be, but it's hard to avoid, and everything is sort of fresh. Which then raises the question of why not give it some time and maybe I can sift through the immediate malaise and write something more thoughtful. My answer to that is, if I wait too long, I won't write about it at all. I want to get this down, because it just feels like the right thing to do and it feels good (at least I hope it will).

This is really lame I know (remember the whiney self indulgent defense I gave earlier) But I've been listening to this song a lot and rather than attempt to sort through all of these emotions and splatter them onto this blog, I'll let it speak for me. This has proved far more difficult than I previously expected it to be. I'm not ignoring these emotions, I just can't organize them in any rational way. That's the great thing about songwriters, poets, and all writers in general: they have the ability to speak to and for you. A great song can be personal and universal all at the same time, so I don't feel like this is a cop out.

Anyway, I don't mean to be a bummer. I'm going to try and continue to write about all kinds of things here at bi-mon-sci-fi-con. I'm going to see one of the greatest bands in the world tonight. I'll let you all know about this amazing show later on, although I think nate will do a better job than me. He'll definitely take better pictures, see you guys later...

so long, so long

Hand out the window
Floatin’ on air
Just a flip of the wrist
I’d be wavin’ you goodbye

Drive past the lifeguard stand
Where I sit around waiting for you to remember
Well past the beach hotels
Where the girls are getting’ bronzed on their monogrammed towels

I drive this ocean road
And remember

How the girls could turn to ghosts before your eyes
And the very dreams that led to them are keeping them from dying
And how the grace with which she walked into your life
And stay with you in your steps , pace with you a while
For so long, so long
so long so long

The speaker in this door is blown
So nothing sounds quite right
And I drive this ocean road
And I remember
The small of your back
And the nape of your neck
And the soft way you’d hold me in the night

I remember

How the girls can turn to ghosts before your eyes
And the very dreams that led to them are keeping them from dying
And how the grace with which she walked into your life
Will stay you in your steps, and pace with you a while
So long, so long,

so long, so long

And I will leave under the cover
Of summer’s kiss upon the sky
Like the stone face of your lover
Just before she says goodbye
I was thinkin' that the season could be held between my arms
But just as summer’s hold is fleeting
I was here but now I’m gone
I’m gone

I'm gone, I'm gone