Before I begin. I was just watching letterman and Zach Braff was on to promote his new movie the last kiss. As Braff walked on the band started playing "Last Kiss" in some kind of jazz band ensemble cover of it. Last Kiss is the J. Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers song that Pearl Jam completely kicked ass with. I thought it was an odd choice, just wanted to share that. Also the movie looks lame, Zach Braff is lame.
Anyway, as Nate's blog has previously reported, we are all done here. Tomorrow morning, Nate and I set out on expanse across this great nation of ours en route to Avondale. Everybody else has left and all that remains is this dualistic notion of loss (end of Summer, always a sad time for me) and extreme joy and elation (in light of completing the movie). We are going through the seemingly contrasting and negating oppositions of those two extremes of emotions. It's a weird thing, not a bad thing by any stretch of the imagination. We did it, there's no reason to be bummed. And I personally think Nate has a pretty damn good movie on his hands (sound issues aside...oh boy). Maybe this just means that (gasp!) we had a really good time shooting this movie and we're going to miss it. How awful.
"Are you being sarcastic, dude?"
"I don't even know anymore."
In summation, I'm really happy we're done, and I'm really happy to leave. I'm really happy to go home. I'm happy.
"I want to see my family
my wife and child waiting for me
I've got to go home
I've been so alone you see"
An exaggeration perhaps but a really good song covered by Iron and Wine that I was listening to today. I like this whole stream of concsiousness thing...it fits me like a speedo.
"I'm a selfish old crank, and that fits me like a Speedo"
Okay, I'll stop.
Two more things before I tucker off to bed...
I watched a movie tonight (recommended by Dad) called Paris, Texas. It's about a guy lost in the desert who goes on a search to essentially reunite his son and wife. It's an epic movie muted by a refreshing lack of excessive mush usually heaped upon hollywood projects such as this. It's also got an amazing visual style, extreme neon colors accentuate the perpetual lonliness of the American west (a topic I am becoming more and more interested in as you will not in later blogs). The environment seems to be built on harsh extremes not meant for sane human beings. It's a really powerful film that doesn't really hit you until after you watch it. Then it's like a punch to the gut. There was one scene that stuck with me, and it makes sense because Roger Ebert called it one of the best movie monologues in cinema history (I don't know about that, I mean Roger Ebert is never wrong so I don't know what to think). Anyway, in the scene Travis (Harry Dean Stanton) has relocated his estranged wife in a peep show booth in Texas. He clarifies to his ex-lover, Jane (Nastassja Kinski) the reason for his departure in an explanation that has untold years of regret sewn into its account. Regret for not for ony for his actions but for the self pity he used to rationalize them. She ends the scene with one of the most devastating monologues I've ever heard. It's too complex for tears.
"I... I used to make long speeches to you after you left. I used to talk to you all the time, even though I was alone. I walked around for months talking to you. Now I don't know what to say. It was easier when I just imagined you. I even imagined you talking back to me. We'd have long conversations, the two of us. lt was almost like you were there. I could hear you, I could see you, smell you. I could hear your voice. Sometimes your voice would wake me up. It would wake me up in the middle of the night, just like you were in the room with me. Then... it slowly faded. I couldn't picture you anymore. I tried to talk out loud to you like I used to, but there was nothing there. I couldn't hear you. Then... I just gave it up. Everything stopped. You just... disappeared. And now I'm working here. I hear your voice all the time. Every man has your voice."
Definitely check this out if you have the chance. Really strong flick.
While you're listening to my recommendations, also check out Nine Lives while you're at it. The only film I can remember that captures of the feeling of reading a great collection of short stories. Check it out for real.
One last thing. See this is what I do, I get all my stuff out in one blog entry and then I lay dormant for weeks and weeks on end. I need to parcel this out a little more evenly, that will be a new year's resolution.
It made my heart sing to see the U.S. Government protecting our security and livelihood in the face of such an undeniable terrorist threat as the one posed by these San Francisco citizens. It's truly mind blowing to me that this "conservative" administration has adopted such a neo-conservative attitude when it comes to demolishing civil liberties and ignoring the consitution whenever they see fit.
Yet, somehow, when it comes to an issue that really calls for Government Assistance (you'd figure the neocons in charge would jump all over an opportunity like this), like the Hurricane Katrina relief. They are nowhere to be found, they are admirably sticking to their conservative roots of non governmental interference. Except of course when it comes to awarding no bid contracts to businesses (exploiting this American war zone just like they did the one in Iraq). And essentially putting a big "whites-only" sign all over most of New Orleans through their sleazy means. If this all sounds a little extreme (I apologize if it does but this is a real pisser), check out Amy Goodman's coverage of the anniversary of the disaster over at Democracy Now! (make sure you check out August 29th's show if you're reading this tomorrow. There's some real fascinating and damming stuff over there and coupled with a recent ass wiping of the constitution that our government seems to encourage. I don't know. Sorry to complain.
Okay, I'm going to bed. I've talked your ear off enough, this should give you enough to chew on for another month, when I decide to write in this thing again. See you guys back in PA.
"Cheer up, you miserable fuck
This has gone on long enough
And I don't want to hear anymore
'Cos it you wait for the day
You find your thinking bends to straight
You'll be waiting for a long, long time
Oh you, well you are no fun
And I'm so dumb
But please let us not be lonely, again."
